Single.

Yep, I did it. I finally let go and changed my status to single. It was the exchanging of acquired stuff that made it final. Not quasi-surreal....but final.

BUT. I'm 30, in pretty good shape, blonde, smart, employed with two great kids that have a very involved father. I get my hugs and kisses from my kids, take out my aggression by hollaring at my yapping dogs and have my adult conversation with you.....even if you never talk back with me.

Oddly, I'm ok with being single. So far its been rewarding and I like it. I'll be all right.

Now you can proceed with your day with that useless piece of information that I almost didn't bless you with sharing. Shame on me. :-)

Probably slow blogging for the rest of the day....got stuff to do.

Mood: Quaint.

Long jog.

Days like this are awesome. I endured a long jog today that I needed very badly. It was incredible. I did however wear my ankle brace because that wii fit has made it sore. It'll be fine.

During my jog I came across some things that made me smile and I soooo wish I had my camera on me during those moments!

1.) Four boys playing war around a house in the front yard. I actually slowed down to a walk just to watch the events transpire. One boy was planted with his back to a tree hidden from the other boys view. He sat patiently as the other three slowly emerged from the side of the house trying hard to tip toe and looking around for him. He waited for just the right moment before jumping out and tagging two of them. The last one actually tagged him. I'm assuming tag is the right word...they each had buzzers that went off. It was great. My timing couldn't have been more perfect.

2.) The middle aged guy taking the keg from the minivan to the garage. I'm positive he was getting ready for tomorrow's fooseball party....but still, he made me giggle because he had the hat on backwards. Funny sight.

3.) The whole family that said hi. The cutest being the little girl. I'm sure they have their problems, but one boy: five-ish on bike, girl: eight-ish on scooter, lil girl: four-ish-on bike with training wheels, mom and dad holding hands with oversized poodle on a leash. Each and every member said hi, the littlest girl had a genuine big smile on her face when she said hi. Even the dog gave a lil yelp...I translated it to be a friendly hi since he was wagging his tail in such an excited manner.

4.) Double weeping willow trees made me decide that they are very pretty in the winter or summer and I'm gonna plant a couple in my yard.

5.) The cute guy that checked me out and gave me an approving how you doing look. I appreciated that......I blushed and felt a little embarrassed.

Mood: Pretty good.

Choices.

It's always good to have choices. This weekend, without kids...ick..., I have invites to places. I also have a personal agenda on a to-do list. Its that list of meant to's and also wanted-to's. So, I've moved up to busy happy gal.

Also, weekend time is weigh in time. As of last week, I lost 8 pounds. That's a lot for four weeks! I'm not sure this week is going to be much of a help, but I'm pretty sure I didn't gain any. I had trouble on the ice day keeping my appetite under control.....have you ever seen that commercial with the "hungry" on it? #1 I think hungry is cute as can be. #2 I giggle every single time I see the temptress sit on the couch with the laptop in lap and him sit down next to her, open the box of pizza and move a hand around as if the pizza were a laptop and he were typing. Yep, not only am I drop dead gorgeous; I'm simple minded and easily amused. I like those three qualities about myself.

Back to busy...lunch's time over and I need to get logged stuff filed and off my desk before the timesheets fly in.

Mood: Friday good.

Practice.

Whew. We made it through the entire play.

Now here was the different part.....

At rehearsal tonight, we had people in the audience reading the play. All the actors were to do their parts without speaking. It was the oddest practice ever. BUT it was fantastic. We actually got through the whole play.

Now between the second and third acts the director calls everyone to the stage to discuss the last scene. Here is where I had THAT moment as THAT mother. It was fifteen or twenty after nine and we had previously set the time to stop rehearsals at nine.....unless anyone has any objections, then.....

.....now at that moment everyone was so wishy washy on whether to proceed, call in another practice tomorrow night, start where we left off on Monday....I was having the worst time reading everyone...so i through out the....well, I'm not griping, but tomorrow is test day for kids. Of course, my dumb self, I forget half those kids are all home schooled kids.

So, on we went. It was just after ten when we got out.....now, I will say it was worth it to get through the entire play with the whole cast there....minus a couple of field hands that have minor non speaking parts. It felt better.

It was the weirdest feeling to act your part and not say your part. It was hard not to do the silent bobble head character while someone else was reading all the lines.

So, folks, there is the boring post on play practice tonight. Oh, except I failed to mention the stage children are fantastic. I'm very proud of their behavior back stage (its hard doing the hurry up and wait thing) annnd, their acting is wonderful. go kids!

The play opens in two weeks. I'll be posting info soon. And yes, I DEMAND your presence. See? I demanded and so it will be. Don't make me cry....I'll contract the hiccups again.

Mood: Lifted.

Texas

.....is a warm place and we don't see a lot of ice. Here is a spectacular slide of why I'm glad we don't. Poor guy.

....and if you really really love me, then you will skip the roses and leave this on my desk. Now that's why I call a sensible gift. It's two in one.....and you can make mine Riesling.

.....this is what I call one handsome man. Woo. I'm light headed.

Mood: Rest.

Salt....

........on the wound.

I consulted with professional help today......and the verdict is: I was wrong. So wrong. It really is the Baby Daddy's weekend. Well, that sucks. Its bad enough that I was looking forward to this weekend with the girls and even worse that I was wrong about him being wrong. That, my dear, is wrong. Just wrong. And even more depressing. Great. Thanks.

Play practice tonight. The girls are excited because they are taking their costume possibilities for the director to look at. Me? I left my freakin play book at the office. I'm a failure. Tonight we are off book so technically its a good thing that I forgot my book, but I'm unsure of my cues. I will at some point get hollared at. Eh. She still loves me. I think. Heck, I hope.

Definition of off book: Off book is when the actors must have their lines memorized and be able to maneuver through the scene without their book.

Right now I'm listening to November Rain by Bon Jovi on my itunes in the background. Sigh.

All right... now for a little web surfing to see if I can come up with something strange to give you while I'm out practicing so you can truly ponder of my sanity.

Mood: Unsure.

Whining Moment

If you don't want to read a rant on me being a whiny baby, then go ahead and skip this one now.

Emotionally, I've been a wreck for a few weeks, but I've had this and that to keep me distracted and mostly held together. I'm a girl. I'm allowed to be emotional when it comes to heart break. Period.

This weekend is my weekend with the kids. Baby Daddy feels otherwise. I could easily argue and prove that I'm right, but he already has tickets for the Harlom Globe Trotters visit to Dallas. Boo. So, if I argue and prove him right then the result is that he doesn't get to take them to that. I care, right? Well, I care about their disappointment.

Double boo for me.....what the heck am I supposed to do with myself this weekend? I was not prepared for this one bit.

Now I want to cry. Seriously, I do. But I want to cry in a...I'm four years old and didn't get my way kind of way.

If you made it this far and actually read all that, then you are a good stalker and I am thankful for you.

Mood: Notahappy.

It was bound to happen....

Oh me oh my!!

I have two girls. I am a girl. This is a house full of girls. IT was bound to happen one day or another. In fact, I'm pretty sure it happens in every girls life. I, too, remember the time when it happened to me. My mom and great grandmother were both by my side to see me through that time in my life.

So, my little girl, my baby, my offspring....yep it happened to her.

And I know for a fact you won't hesitate for a second to see what the heck is going on.

Click here to see what happened.

Mood: Traumatic.

Playing

I got rid of my hiccups...although I wouldn't be surprised if they came back. I think for the first time in my life I sneezed and hiccuped at the same time. That's harsh.

I like to play a game with twitter. I start with someone I know and see how far I can get before I hit a twitterite with protected updates. It's like a maze. Yep, that reason #48 that makes me weird.

I'm on a mailing list for a director and I get a mailing every time they have auditions and open new shows. They have the oddest craziest stuff. I just received the latest mailing for their newest show. I think I'm actually gonna go see it in a couple of weeks. Just the thought is something to look forward to. I love theater.

Speaking of...tonight is last chance to get cleaned up. Tonight's play rehearsal didn't get canceled but it will be concentrating on a scene that I'm not in. So tonight I'm off and we received an email saying we will not be practicing on Friday night as feared due to the icy weather.

Off to clean little girls rooms....I'm scared. Very. Scared.

Mood: All napped up.

Cabin Fever

I. Must. Get. Out. Of. This. House.

The workplace started late and the bosses went in at noon...so rumor tells me.

I for one am stuck home cause I ain't got nobody to watch my offsprungs. I could take them back up there with me, but they tend to get restless fast in that break room.

Poor kids. Since their rooms have been so messy, they first got grounded from the computer. Day two of messy messy rooms and lack of tv is now added to that list. I warned the wii is the next to go. After that, I will start assigning tedious cleaning projects....scrubbing floors, sweeping garage....

My quest for a clean home will not be met with resistance. I shall stand tall and overcome this battle!!!

Ok, I promise I will not eat anymore peanut butter cookies.


Well, at least no more for today.

Mood: Cooped

Wuss.

I'm cold. Very cold.

I'm Texan. Yes, I am a wuss. (Yes Galloway-you said it best.)

Where are you, blankie? Put your arms around me and warm me up.

I'm ready for summer. Now.

If it doesn't arrive soon I shall runaway to a warmer place. Much warmer.

Until then....enjoy a pic of me kissing a fish.

Mood: Sugar wearing off.

Dear Ice Storm,

Welcome to Wise County, Texas. It would please me to no ends if you would make yourself at home. In honor of your expected arrival we closed our schools. We also threw dirt upon bridges from the back of a pickup truck as part of a ceremonious blessing for you.

Not that I'm one to complain about sticking to a schedule, but you did arrive a little on the late side. I had hoped your presence would have been felt stronger much sooner than the 20th hour of this day. I mean, we closed the schools and the roads didn't really start to get bad until around the 15th hour.

At any rate, eagerly we accept you into our humble existence and it is my hope that we treat you well. Just please, don't feel it necessary to over extend your stay. According to the schedule you are to leave upon the awakening of the sun. Our school, according to their website, demands the attention of my offspring at the tenth hour tomorrow.

Be swift along your journey and take with you our love to your next destination.

Mood: High on peanut butter cookies

You ask...

.....if it will rain.

Well, here is your answer.

You're welcome.

Mood: Cold

Worked

Last week and yesterday was so busy I let one payroll deduction slip through the crack, so I went in today to get it done since the main office was still operating. I'm glad I went in, I had a few emails that needed action on my part. That would have made tomorrow even hecticer. Hectic-er. I'm sure that's a word.

The girls enjoyed mama's work, as always. The guys usually tease them. Today one of the guys gave them a dollar each for the snack machines. The girls were very excited. I also arrived to find a big cinnamon roll on my desk from one of the guys. I nibbled a little piece. Oh my...that was good. I handed it over to the girls.

Another temptation was one of the guys trying to offer me a bag of m&m's. I'm starting to wonder if there is a betting pool somewhere on who can get me to cave. Good thing they don't know about my love for Dairy Queen blizzards.....you won't tell will you?

Mood: Defrosting

Gambling

All right, schools are closed....yea! But work is not....oh no!!

At the moment I can get away with calling in since I have no one for kids to be with. I did call in, but on the thought that within the next couple of hours its gonna be nasty out there and I don't want children stuck somewhere random and me not being able to get them.

Good grief, those poor guys in that shop! Its 28 degrees outside and they are working with steel....outside. Here I am with a bowl of lucky charms, my comfy robe and some knee high socks on.

If the weather doesn't get bad bad horrible here pretty quick, I'll regret even more not going in.

For now....going back to tv and bed.

Mood: Nervous

Evening.

Fun with the wii while its cold outside.

I like that wii fit. I would love it, but I'm fairly certain it mocked me.

I did the rhythm game....which is a lot harder than it looks. I started out with the easy one and got good enough to unlock the harder one. Then they throw in this clapping bit on top of the complicated stepping around moves. Hey I was raised Church of Christ....I feel lucky to even move in the first place much less clap at the same time.

So naturally the first time I do the advance one, I screw up. It had to stop three times to tell me to keep up with the other mii's. Then at the end of the segment, all the mii's swayed slowly back and forth with their head's hung in shame with slow sad music. Hey! That was just uncalled for! Cracked me up, yes...but uncalled for.

Back to the next set....I'm sooo keeping my fingers crossed it ices tomorrow. I love my job and workplace, but there is something about enjoying an ice day. This is Texas, we get teased with bad weather every once in a while...come on, bring it on. I even grocery shopped today...

OH! PS. The next time I don't have kids....I'm breaking out the alcohol and playing the wii. Wait....brain wheel turning....kids are asleep...hmmm...

Mood: Hopeful.

Whew.

What an insanely busy day I've had today. From beginning to end, it was busy. Just busy.

I was hit from ten different directions for most of the day. There was a time around....30 minutes before quitting time that I finished all the .....has to be done now stuff.

Now we're off to tumbling, where I will sit in the parent's room and gladly just read lines from my play.

When we get home I shall then vigorously work out with the wii fit for about thirty minutes just to let off some.....something.

New resolutions for the week: 1) quit whining so much and suck it up. 2) Don't look at websites that will leave a feeling of the need to whine---and no I'm not referring to porn. Well, mostly.

Mood: Dragging.

Weekend Wrap Up

I'm not sure I gave myself enough credit ahead of time for how strong I could be mentally. The jogs were great....I could have done without a little cold front, but I stood on top of a hill that I jogged up and looked over my kingdom. My house, is also amazingly cleaner than its probably ever been and I am nowhere near finished. I have plans that I should have done before now.

Last weekend I had suffered one of my saddest moments in a quite a while. I had a icky feeling it was coming, but it still sucked. Driving down the highway late at night I cried for a 26 mile stretch...then exited to my home.

Saturday night after the movie, I found myself on that same stretch, same time of night, and told myself I was not going to cry. Tsk. Tsk. Tsk...what a sap I am. I blame the same music that has been following me around and driving me bonkers for a week now. I so love hate music right now. Well, that and it was a bit hard on a gal to have that empty seat next to ya in a movie theater.

I'll survive. Someone (a frienemy) once told me that I'm like a cat, I always land on my feet. Hopefully that will stay true.

Off to bed. I washed the covers this weekend and they smell great....downy spring fresh. Maybe I'll dream of warmth (and remember dreaming).

Mood: Quiet

Re-Review

OK, movie review second thought...

...I don't take back the sub par acting or predictability but it wasn't too horrible. I think I put robbed for the mood and I'm not sure there was any movie out there that would have left me really really happy. I went alone and felt....alone.

The movie I wanted to see wasn't at that theater, but I love love love the movie tavern. I just adore eating greasy eggrolls, drinking a margarita, and sitting in a leather executive chair. Now not every Movie Tavern is that nice. The one in Bedford TX just happens to be nicer than others I've been to.

I should really broden my horizons and venture out. I'll do that eventually. Right now I'm pleased that I accomplished that small feat. I'm not sure I've ever ever been to a movie by myself before. That was a first. I'm sure I'll have plenty more firsts along the way.

Mood: Not completely robbed, I mentioned the food, margarita and chair.....(Seinfeld reference..kinda)

Kids home.

Yea! I made it through the weekend. I'm still alive and didn't sit on the floor with a box of tissues (at least not for more than thirty minutes at a time.)

Jog was incredible. I was shocked on how far I went and not walking. It felt great...well, not counting the asthmatic moment I'm still feeling two hours later.

My best moment today was mother asking me specifically how much weight I'd lost because she could tell by looking at me that I had. Mother isn't typically one to fill ya full of fluff, so I appreciated that comment. It made me feel like I was getting somewhere.

After church, after lunch, we went to Sams to get the treadmill she wanted. We walk in and they've got the silly wii fit for eighty bucks. I stopped dead in my tracks. If I got that it would come out of my savings account. What did I do? Yep, I hit it...I sooo hit it! Excited and feeling guilty all at the same time. Next wii splurge will be the Mario Cart. I've heard fantastic reviews. I'm not sure they are super excited over the Petz game I got them last. Surprised they're not all over it but...Mario, they'll love.

I also brought home the eliptical machine from my Dad's office building.

Speaking of....Dad looked terrible today. I'm not sure that heart of his is ticking quite like it should. This is one of those times when his stubbornness drives me crazy.

Kids home makes me happy. Their dad failed to mention (as if we ever speak) that little one threw up last night. I somehow feel that is pertinent information. Maybe its just me...but I feel like that could be worth mentioning. She still claims she doesn't feel good, but she did eat dinner.

Speaking of kids, I'm getting kicked off the computer...older one demands some surfing time. Which means, I need to get up and finish cleaning up after dinner. More later....they gotta go to bed sometime.

Mood: Distracted.